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Who doesn't want to get good grades? What parent doesn't want their child to get A's and B's? I am not sure that there is any parent who does not want their child to be successful in school. Psychologists have studied students who are successful and those who are not. One variable that contributes to academic success is simply self-control.
What is self-control? A general definition is managing what you do, how you respond to your feelings and emotions, and not going along with your impulses. It is intentionally exercising restraint and regulation of your thoughts, feelings, and behavior so that the things that you value and your goals can be accomplished. A simple example is: Should I watch TV or study for a test? Should I go to basketball practice or to a movie? Choosing short-term fun can have long-term unfortunate consequences. Since we can't do two things at the same time, a choice must be made. To be successful, your thoughts, feelings and actions must be in line with the desired outcome. If not, you should not be surprised when you fail. For students, self-regulated learning can lead to academic success.
You can't yell and punish self-control into someone. Psychologists know that self-control is self-initiated. When a student puts down the game controller or his phone to work on homework, that is self-control. Self-control is also evident when the student chooses to do what needs to be done to achieve a goal that is important and valued, even when tempted to do something less important but more enjoyable than the work that they know is important and maybe not so fun. They have to keep the important and valuable goal in mind when briefly distracted by less valuable things that they may like to do.
It is known that a student will exercise self-control when they begin to recognize that even boring school work is important for their future. Then the work is relevant. They will learn the material and do the work whether they enjoy it or not. They are able to put aside the distracting fun option to pursue their dream or goal. They understand that pursuing their long-term goals is more important than any other thing that they could do. The road to success is cluttered by boring, unexciting, tedious, and flat-out dull things that must be learned and done. Too bad, that is life.
What do some studies find that students are doing instead of their schoolwork? Some will spend seven hours a day on their phone. Another study found that 92 percent will send and receive text messages while in class. Students can spend about 5.5 hours a day on things like video games, phones, television, tablets, etc. Another study found that children between the ages of eight and 12 may average 3.5 hours on some type of entertainment media. Who has time for serious schoolwork with that kind of schedule? Not much time left for academic pursuits.
Psychologists have learned that strategies for learning and good study skills are important, but self-control is a key factor. What good are learning skills and strategies if the student is playing video games? A prerequisite for any type of success is motivation. No motivation to do well in academic matters will evolve into the development of self-control. It doesn't matter what grade a student is in, self- control is relevant.
It is possible for us to have several competing goals at roughly the same time. We might have two or more thoughts about which one to do. There may be competing urges or impulses to do something, but which is the right one? As students grow they have to learn to control their urges and impulses without the need for parental oversight and regulation. How does the development of self-regulation and self-control unfold?
It starts by looking ahead and developing some strategies so that you are already prepared to meet temptation when it is encountered. The student needs to recognize that there are situations that are favorable and appropriate to do homework and to study. Hopefully, they will also lean more toward working alone than with others who may be quite distracting and competing for the student's attention. Learning to pick the right work situation in which to do academic work is a step in the right direction.
A student weakens the effect of undesirable urges and impulses by looking at their textbook and not at their cell phone (which should not be anywhere near them when doing homework or studying). If they can see it or hear it, the temptation to talk to their friends or play a game on it may be too enticing, irresistible and impossible to ignore. The student has a decent chance to resist if they look at something else...hopefully at the book or homework.
It is also helpful if the student has some concept of the future. If they have certain dreams and can see that school is the stepping stone to their future, that may support self-regulation. Then the dream of achieving that future gives value to academic work. That is a big difference from looking at schoolwork as just pointless busywork.
On their own, the student must ultimately make judgments about what is good for them. They must learn to resist temptation and force themselves to do the right thing. I have told many students that the people who get the promotions and decent salaries are the ones who do the things they don't like just as well as the things they do like. You do the job to the best standards, whether it is hard or easy, pleasant or unpleasant. Go with the things that tempt you after the work is done. That is self-regulation.
There is much more to this subject than the above. There is more to academic success than the ability to self-regulate, but self-regulation plays a major role.