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Dear Annie

Dear Annie: This is an issue I imagine many people are having. Sometimes my family members post things I disagree with online. Many times, I’ve found myself typing up a comment, only to decide against clicking the “submit” button. I really don’t want to get into arguments with loved ones about politics, so I refrain from saying anything. I just talk to friends who already pretty much agree with me on the major issues. But that doesn’t seem right, either. Isn’t that part of why our country is so polarized right now? I feel that it’s my responsibility to have civilized discussions with people with whom I disagree so I might change their minds and they might change mine. Should I jump into these conversations and speak my mind or continue to keep quiet? Is sharing caring? — Unsure in Ohio

Dear Unsure: Respectfully debating ideas with differently minded folks is healthy and positive. Of course, that’s not what anyone is doing on Facebook. Though there are always exceptions, the vast majority of political “debate” on social media is an endless mudslinging contest in which everyone gets dirty and nobody wins. If you want to talk to your relatives about these issues, it’d be wiser to do so in person or at least over the phone so you can hear each other’s tone of voice. But it would be wiser still to focus your energy on effecting positive change in your community rather than on relatives’ minds that don’t want changing.

Dear Annie: I’d like to respond to “Ethan in Hanover” about dating. I am also on the autism spectrum. When I was his age, I developed an unrequited crush on a woman named “Colleen.” She had no understanding of autism spectrum disorder and said that I was “too weird to be liked.” Her remarks affected me so much that I ended up losing 10 pounds in two weeks. It took me four years to get over this woman. I wised up after that experience.

If I were Ethan, I would give “Erin” (who is also on the spectrum) a chance. — Bob in Upstate New York

Dear Bob: Anyone who would tell someone he is “too weird to be liked” is too heartless to love. How sad. I’m sorry this woman hurt you, but I’m glad you saw her true colors right off the bat and were eventually able to move on. Thanks for sharing your words of wisdom with the world.

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