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Cool Facebook User VS Facebook Loser

January 11, 2012 - Jennifer Brookens
Facebook is a double-edged sword. I admit I use it a lot; it’s great for keeping in touch with distant friends and family members. But along with the abuse (using the site for bullying, stalking, etc.), there are some other pitfalls. A friend of mine recently composed this list (thanks Ken), which made me think of some more Facebook sins I added here (including some that I’ve been guilty of too). But remembering some of these things before you post could keep you from being a “friend” that gets ignored, hidden or unfriended. (And I’ll try to lay off the “talking kitty” posts!)

Cool Facebook User VS Facebook Loser:

Facebook Cool: Sharing something funny that happened. Facebook Loser: Sharing something funny that happened to a Facebook friend you’ve never actually met in person.

Facebook Cool: Sharing a cute picture of your kid. Facebook Loser: Having every picture of your kid on your profile, and not a single picture of you.

Facebook Cool: “Hey Jenn, just wanted to write on your wall and say hi, how are ya? Call me for lunch!” Facebook Loser: Hey Jenn, Andrea needs your help to get more coins in FarmFrontierCityCastleLamesville. She also just answered a question about you, click here to download the app to find out what she said!

Facebook Cool: Sharing a photo of you and your friends out on the town with the caption, “Hanging with my BFFs” on Saturday at 1 a.m. Facebook Loser: “Anybody want to chat? I’m bored.” on Saturday at 1 a.m.

Facebook Cool: “I just wanted to let everyone know that Grandpa Joe passed away this morning, thanks for your thoughts and prayers.” Facebook Loser: Posting something everyday about how much you miss Grandpa Joe, with some inspirational pictures of clouds and sun, until the next person you know dies. He wasn’t even your grandpa.

Facebook Cool: Occasionally using the share feature on something funny. Facebook Loser: Sharing every stupid picture of a kitten, political cartoon, or sassy slogan you see. And sharing seven or more of them in one day.

Facebook Cool: “I’m feeling great after a workout!“ Facebook Loser: “Worked out for the second time today! Gonna have a 200-calorie protein shake, go for a hike, and hit the gym again later!” Get over yourself! Who has the time to do all of that, the rest of us work! And must you post pictures of every “healthy” meal you consume?!

Facebook Cool: “Please click the link today to donate for this charity that I spend actual time volunteering.” Facebook Loser: “Please share this post on your wall if you are against (whatever) for one hour, I bet you aren’t brave enough, and only 2% of you will care!”

Facebook Cool: “My mom is in surgery today. All your thoughts and prayers are appreciated.” Facebook Loser: “OW! I stubbed my toe, slept crooked and almost swallowed a toothpick! Pray for Me! Start a prayer circle!”

Facebook Cool: “Happy Anniversary to the man/woman I love! One (or 10 or 20) years today!” Facebook Loser: “Happy three-week Anniversary to the man who I’d be absolutely nothing without. He’s the best! He listens to Celine Dion songs and cries with me. My love for him is eternal...” (Gag! These are the ones whose statuses go to “Single” or “It’s complicated” two days later. With accompanying Celine Dion lyrics.)

Facebook Cool: “Big day ahead with the (marathon/scout camp/new job/etc).” Facebook Fool: “Today I’m trimming my toenails!” (an hour later) “I’m going to the store!” (half-hour later) “Bought my favorite BBQ potato chips! Yum!” (10 minutes later) “Going to the bathroom,..” PLEASE DON’T TELL US WHAT HAPPENS NEXT!!


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