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Felix domesticus x 2

April 7, 2009 - Lee Smith
I guess I'm among the average crowd that always has considered cats to be smarter than dogs. Now, after owning two cats for five years, I think the difference is negligible.

Cats have certain characteristics that make them outshine dogs. They can potty indoors and bathe themselves. These traits are endearing for their owners, but they don't mean cats can do calculus. My cats happen to be quite social, while many cats I've known like to run and hide from strangers. "Fear" does not equal "smart." But neither does approaching every person as if they adored you.

I'll tell you something else about cats: They're weird. They'll sleep 20 hours and then feel compelled to walk the house yowling at 4 a.m. They'll curl their tails up, arch their backs and run/hop in some sort of frenetic squirrel dance. They'll wrestle with each other like idiots.

Cats allegedly are finicky, but it all depends. When we first got ours, I took notice of their habits, such as trying to "bury" my coffee cup located on the floor as if it were one of their own fresh "creations." But cats don't really know what's good for them, even though they turn down 90 percent of human food. Our fattest cat will eat ice cream, potato chips and slices of American cheese. The other prefers fresh tuna, which his meaty brother won't touch. The mainstay in their diet is dry kitty food. Open the bag and they both come running. Now, I've tasted this stuff and it's like eating sand/cardboard. And yet it's feline heaven. Morons.

All in all, owning — are they really owned? — cats isn't too bad. I'm not sure if its smart.


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